It may be delayed but I have been meaning to write this for a little while. I love writing about my experiences, lessons and what may be on my mind. I also love reading about other peoples stories. It’s always bitter sweet when the year comes to a close and everyone is displaying their nostalgia either good or bad about the 365 days behind them. You get three kinds of people I find; Those who write about their year in a quick Facebook summary, those who complain about people who write their Facebook summaries and then the rest who simply just wave the last year good bye silently and effortlessly to themselves.
I’m none of those. I write it on my blog. So if you find yourself here reading my ‘summary’ then you clicked the link and there fore cannot complain. Whoever out there is complaining though about such minor things I feel for you and yet i’m also not very bothered what you think.
Anyway – all of this has nothing to do with what this Blog is about. This Blog is about change, moving forward, positivity and wildly passionate hope for the future. It’s about learning from past mistakes, actions and encounters.
This is all about what I have decided to leave behind in 2018. With great reasoning, contemplation and some stubbornness. Here’s what it is:
1. Doubting my intuition and making the same mistakes over again
Ever have that funky gut feeling before making the wrong decision? It feels like butterflies in your stomach whilst your head and heart are having a heated debate worse than when you’re deciding where to eat with your spouse. It’s happened more times than I can count this year and yet I kept ignoring it. When you ignore that inner instinct and try do the more ‘sensible’ thing then you’re bound to be humbled by the universe – well at least I was. So this year is all about listening to that inner voice screaming and shouting at me instead of ignoring it. Intuition; you are the captain now.
2. Caring too much about what strangers think
I am a victim and also a perpetrator. Before I explain – 2018 I must admit was better. I put myself out there more than anything and achieved my goal of embracing it.
Why I fell victim: Not making decisions or actions based on other people staring at me weirdly in public or what they would say about me
Why I was a perpetrator: I caught myself numerous times people watching and judging. I’m that bitch staring at someone for being quirky, wild and untamed when deep down inside I want to be just like them
2019 goal: Stop caring what strangers think and live in a bubble // Stop caring what strangers are doing and mind your damn business.
Result: THE WORLD IS A FANTASTIC FREE SAFE PLACE
3. Being involved in conversations sparked by negativity, bad mouthing others or complaining
This is definitely something I tried to leave behind in 2017 and it decided to make guest appearances in 2018. There’s nothing that can destroy a positive mindset/inner peace/life party more than being surrounded by absolute grinches. There’s no other way I can describe it. I love spending time with those who are positive, full of love with the world and those who share ideas, passions, happy stories and lessons. There is so much more to life than speaking badly of others and complaining. Just be grateful and appreciate more. 2019 is all about good energy. If you don’t have anything good to say then I’m out.
Thank you, next.
4. Letting other people bring me down and staying around for it – whether that’s family, friends or acquaintances
I definitely know my worth but there’s been a few times where my head got the better of me and I let what others say get me down. . Sometimes it’s a good reminder to know that people only put you down or have some nasty comment to make (if though they might not think so) because they are either threatened, insecure or going through some inner battle they can’t deal with – so project it outwards onto whoever is in their path.
There’s that saying “No one can make you feel inferior with out your consent” and it’s so very true. This year is all about standing tall and blocking out the naysayers.
5. Spreading my love so far and wide to those who completely squander it
I have always treated everyone close to me with love and kindness to the best of my ability. I care so deeply for those around me to me own detriment. After giving so much energy into relationships that are so one sided it eventually just drains a person. I have made a vow to myself to keep loving and caring but place a limit on it. Once the limit has been reached there will be nothing left to give and whatever relationships come to end I will be at peace with it this time. I’d rather choose my sanity and focus my energy into area’s in my life that will flourish.
6. Not following my wildest dreams
For so long now I have had so many bucket lists, goals and dreams that I have slowly been ticking off. BUT not the biggest, craziest, life-changing ones. So this year will be change. The year of making moves so big they scare the shit out of me but rather place me in a position to advance to the next version I want to be of myself.
Little, forward moving steps are great but I want those great, gigantic leaps honey!
7. Reading 5 books at once and only finishing one
Yes. I am always so interested in a a hundred things all at once that I find myself hopping from book to book hoping I can squeeze it all in on one go. I am creating a rule now. One book at a time until the very end. NO BUTS.
8. Not travelling enough to the uncommon places in the world
This last year I was so blessed (actually just worked my ass off to achieve it) to go travelling oversea’s. It was mind blowing and the memories will last a life time. I will definitely be returning but I want to focus this next year on travelling to more of those hidden gems and learn more about other cultures/environments/histories and more.
I just want to learn more about everything. Is that too much to ask 2019?
9. Self criticism
It’s like I don’t get criticized enough by outside factors so now my brain wants to torture me more. No. No more. Self love is all I have left and all that I am willing to give myself now and forever. Of course there will be moments but for the majority of time I just want to be grateful for all that I am and give myself credit for making it through every day as well as doing an awesome job on top of it.
I am so damn excited for this next year. 2018 was fab but 2019 is going to be extraordinary and out play it with every moment it gets – I can feel it!